Ten Bizarre Grammys
I've always enjoyed the Grammy Awards best by not watching them. That way it's always a fresh and new experience when I hear about how wonderful they were. Damn! I missed them again!
But I went searching for ten bizarre moments that just seem wrong somehow. More wrong than usual. More odd than the Rolling Stones not winning an award until 1994's Voodoo Lounge. It was tough getting it down to just 10, but I wanted each one to really count!
10) "We Are The World" Winning Anything In 1985.: What was that about there being people dying? We're saving our own lives? Not by forcing radio to play this song at regular intervals we weren't. Put a roomful of stars in a recording studio each to sing a line of a tune and then market it as a charity record and wouldn't it really be better if we all just "gave at the office" instead?
9) Herbie Hancock Winning Album Of The Year In 2007 For River: The Joni Letters.: I know the
music industry is in a bad way these days and Herbie Hancock is certainly a
deserving musician for all he's done. But somehow this album doesn't seem like
it would be the best album of any year. I'm sure it has its fans, but does
anyone feel that strongly about it? I'd think it'd get a solid "OK" from Joni
fans and a "pretty good" from Herbie's people. You mean to tell me U2 didn't
make an album this year? No Sting? No wonder.
8) Bruce Springsteen Winning Best Rock Instrumental Performance In 2007 For "Once Upon A Time In The West": I'd missed this Springsteen work. He never won anything for Born To Run, but he's won for this, which upon researching is described thusly:
"Longtime Ennio Morricone fan Bruce Springsteen contributed his own instrumental version of 'Once Upon A Time In The West' for the tribute album We All Love Ennio Morricone. The track features Springsteen playing electric guitar over Morricone's original score recording."
OK, sounds great!
7) Sting Winning A 1983 Grammy For Best Instrumental For
"Brimstone And Treacle.": "Every Breath You Take" is a surefire winner. And
the Police won pretty early on, so the Academy were always aware of Sting. And
since entering their Rolodex, he gets called upon quite often to win and accept
these awards. Considering the Who have never won an award, you gotta feel a
little weird about these things. Sure seems to me like there should've been a Jazz
instrumental that could've beaten out Sting for this one.
6) 1976 Record Of The Year going To "This Masquerade" By George Benson, Beating Out "Afternoon Delight" (Though The Starland Vocal Band Did Win Best New Artist): You kinda expect the wrong song to win the "Record of the Year" Award. It's part of the tradition. "Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap" never won an award and neither did "My Old Man's A Fatso" by the Angry Samoans. So obviously they were robbed. But nothing seems more wrong than George Benson defeating the Starland Vocal Band's "Afternoon Delight." Sure, SVB won the Best New Artist award and went on to many years of sterling success, but this kind of misevaluation of talent makes you wonder if there should really be anything called democracy!
5) The Swingle Singers Winning Best New Artist In 1963: In
1964, the Beatles would win this award. But 1963 belonged to the Swingle
Singers! Ward Swingle was one proud man. But, sadly, those angry, bitter
Englishmen with their "Yeah, Yeah, Yeah" propaganda would quickly lay to waste
the future success of the stunning and deserving Swingle Singers.
4) Awarding No Best New Artist In 1966.: From everything I've ever read, 1966 was considered a pretty good year for music and yet it's the one year there was no Best New Artist? Why don't we do this more often? I'd say 2008 could be a good year to start a new tradition of ignoring all young people everywhere! Let them riot in the streets if they want to be heard.
3) Milli Vanilli Having Their 1990 Grammy Revoked For Not
Performing Their Own Vocals On Their Debut Album.: A big OOPS! But really
shouldn't the award have been given to the men who really did perform the song?
Wasn't the music just as good regardless of who performed it? Or do we all
pretend to like music that has the right name on it? Would Lamb of God fans not
like Lamb of God's music if it was suddenly called The Jonas Brothers? And
would Jonas Brothers fans not like their boys if they went by the name Lucy
Pietro-Andelseki and Her Swinging Nuns?
2) 1980, The Year Of Christopher Cross For Record Of The Year, Album Of The Year, Song Of The Year, Best New Artist, Best Arrangement Accompanying Vocalist(s) For "Sailing" And His Self-titled Debut Album.: Christopher Cross' self-titled debut album beat out Pink Floyd's The Wall and Billy Joel's Glass Houses among the competition. Cross went on to beat out just about everyone that year proving that he had a lasting career to bring us, much as Starland Vocal Band before him and Lauryn Hill after would prove. When it comes to predicting longevity, the Grammys have it!
1) Jethro Tull Winning Best Hard Rock/Metal Performance
Vocal Or Instrumental In 1988 For Crest Of A Knave.: Just ask
Metallica. Who was more deserving of this Hard Rock / Metal Performance more
than those Heavy Metal Gods themselves, the Jethro Tulls? Ok, maybe it
should've gone to the Moody Blues, but they didn't have a record that year did
they? I would've just assumed U2 would win by default, or maybe Bruce
Springsteen. You say these aren't heavy metal bands? Yes, I agree. But what
does that have to do with anything?


Anywho, I doubt you can be taken very seriously among Death/Thrash/Groove Metal circles if you went by the name of "Jonas Brothers". See, these guys want to sound hard and tough. I just don't see them in an ipod next to band names like:
Immolation
Impaled
Pig Head
Death Angel
Slayer
The Jonas Brothers (lolwut?)
See, it doesn't have that terrifying power. but, yeah, it ultimately comes down to the music...(I hope!).
But Rob, you TOTALLY forgot a bizzare moment:
Katy Perry getting nominated for best song (or something along those lines).
Pander=Best now? Then W.A.S.P shoul get an award for their own pandering!
Rush has been up for a Grammy like 7 or 8 times and never won once. I think they get nominated mainly in the Instrumental Rock category (b/c most Industry types hate Geddy's voice)- they got passed up again the year that Springsteen won in that category for whatever you wanna call that thing he did.
Rush is nominated again this year in that same category for a beautiful acoustic guitar piece called "Hope" (or the Obama anthem). Appropriate title of the year, at least.
Hey Grammies, give it to big Al of Rush finally- for being the unsung hero of that amazingly techincal iconic band!!
Alex Lifeson rules!!
Great list. If they held the Grammies in the middle of the forest and no one wathced, would the awards still be valid?
Rob
Lame!!!!!
Best New Artist winners who were less than deserving: Cyndi Lauper and the worst was Air Supply. That Aussie group took it away from paisanos AC/DC!
1992 was one of the worst years in awards. 1.
Unforgettable started this off wrong since that relied on technology to resurrenct a dead person and call it 'new'. That should have been automatic disqualification for Song of the Year. Thanks to Milli Vanilli. 2. Michael Bolton for Best Male? 3. Sting for Best Rock Male. Overall Bryan Adams deserved all 3 awards but only won for Original Song for a Soundtrack. At least he got what he deserved since the Oscars picked Beauty and the Beast for the same category, which was a HUGE error. Also Billboard is more legitimate since it relies on SALES not votes.
I'll never feel guilty for liking a song again.